pinkelephanti: (sam and dean)
[personal profile] pinkelephanti
I WROTE WINCEST O.O
or at least implied, past wincest I think. It's also the first time I've ever written SPN fic :S

This is a Sam POV coda to 5.04, PG-13? maybe. 512 words
Supernatural does not belong to me, etc.
Title comes from the song by Idlewild

Everything And Nothing (Is In The Space Between All Things)

The motel room smells musty and like a million other places they have stayed in all over the country. Sam burrows his nose into the pillow, breathing in the familiar scent that is practically synonymous with home these days, after the smell of leather and the cheap shampoo that Dean buys.

There is a crack in the curtains that allows the pale yellow light from the parking lot to highlight the rumpled beds and the beat-up dresser next to the door. It bleaches all color from the room and for a moment Sam feels like he is caught in an old-fashioned photograph that has turned yellow with age. Dean shifting in his sleep breaks the spell and Sam watches the light play over his brothers back. As he stills, his breathing slips once more into the deep, regular patterns of sleep. Sam listens to the quiet noises of Dean’s breathing and it’s like a salve to the lonely nights that have gone before.

In a way it had almost been worse than the previous summer, then Dean was dead, out of reach and it had all been for Sam; Sam had been too numbed by the horror and pain to really function at all. The past few weeks though, he hadn’t had a choice but to live with the bone deep ache of knowing that Dean was only a phone call away, knowing that he could get into his car and be by his side in a couple of hours, but also knowing that Dean just didn’t want him there. Sam thinks that he’s never seen anything more painful than the relief that showed in Dean’s eyes when Sam suggested that it might be better for them to go their separate ways for a while.

Even now, now that Dean has let him come back and given him this chance to prove himself, there is a chasm that yawns open between them. Sam longs to be able to just touch his brother’s arm or even lean comfortably into his space like he used to, but Dean seems to be projecting a barrier around himself, a metaphorical no-fly zone that Sam doesn’t know how to breach.

The desire to be closer to Dean builds as his gaze fixes on the curve of his shoulder and the line of his neck disappearing into his shirt. Sam is moving before he even realizes it, slipping out from beneath his covers and into the chilly air of the room, Dean’s bed dips under his weight as he climbs in and pulls the blankets over himself, trying his best not to wake Dean in the process. He places his head on the spare pillow and inches forward until he can feel the heat from Dean’s body warming his skin. He doesn’t dare move any closer, but lets the comfort of having Dean next to him again lull him into a contented sleep.

When Sam wakes in the morning, Dean has turned in the night to face him and the space between them is a little bit less.


Now continued here

on 2009-10-07 12:34 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] bitterbird.livejournal.com
this is wonderful Robyn! <3

on 2009-10-07 12:40 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you darling, I'm glad you think so <3

on 2009-10-07 12:46 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] lackadaisy.livejournal.com
Dude this is srsly your first spn fic? It's gorgeous! And very in character for the times I do believe. Much love, and the wincest is implied just enough to get you in under the sam/dean header, but yet...squicky folk could read it with their wincest blinders on and be fine, I think.

*fav'ing* I love this. The good-burn kind of angst. <3 *smishes you*

on 2009-10-07 12:53 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
haha, yes, I've written bits and pieces for other fandoms and J2, but never actually spn. *lol* I'm glad you agree with the characterisation since it mostly came from what we were talking about yesterday :D

Yeah in my mind it was Wincest, but I wasn't sure it was laid out enough that other people would neccessarily even see it *g*

Thanks sweetie! <3 *smish*

on 2009-10-07 12:48 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] runedgirl.livejournal.com
Awww boys....this is a beautiful little piece, manages to convey so much with so little. :)

on 2009-10-07 12:55 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it :D

on 2009-10-07 12:50 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] locknkey.livejournal.com
This was great. You've captured Sam so well here - beautiful!

on 2009-10-07 12:56 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Aww, Thank you! I'm very happy that you think so :)

on 2009-10-07 02:27 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] athenaswirls.livejournal.com
Hi :) Just wanted to say how much I liked this. Sam's grief over Dean's relief at parting, and awareness of the distance still between them. I also dug his thoughts that it was easier when Dean was dead and not just....gone. Hope that makes sense. Anyway. Really groovy :)

on 2009-10-07 10:52 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Hi! Thanks for the comment :) Yeah I still really felt that distance at the end of the episode, so I guess thats where this came from. Perfect sense! Thank you so much, I'm glad you liked it.

on 2009-10-07 03:52 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] lotrabc.livejournal.com
Oh, I loved this. It has such a stillness to it, but so much weight at the same time. I would certainly never guess it was your first SPN OR Wincest fic!

on 2009-10-07 10:54 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thanks for such a lovely comment hon, well, I guess I've read quite a lot of both, so that probably helped ;)

on 2009-10-07 08:54 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] schnute23.livejournal.com
This
was
beautiful
wonderful
warm
comfy
amazing
deep

I ♥ it, really! OMG please write more !!!!<3<3<3<3

on 2009-10-07 11:02 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Oh you! Thanks sweetie, I'm really, really glad you liked it and those are some amazing words! Did you mean more of this specific fic or fic in general? I try lol, but I'm a bit of a lazy fic writer.

*hugs* Thanks for the lovely comment &hearts

on 2009-10-07 04:10 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] schnute23.livejournal.com
I would really love to read more of this specific fic :D It is more than wonderful and I have bookmarked it :) SQUEE

on 2009-10-07 07:36 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Aww, thanks again bb! I can't promise anything 'cos I've said I'll write sequels before and never managed it, but I won't rule it out. &hearts

on 2009-10-07 11:11 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] akintay.livejournal.com
Oh, man. Darling, this is achingly beautiful. And the ending made me tear up a little &hearts

on 2009-10-07 09:02 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you so much Anna <3

YAY tears! *cough* I MEAN, SORRY ABOUT THAT :) I tried to keep the end a tiny bit hopeful.

*hugs*

on 2009-10-07 11:50 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] lazy-8s.livejournal.com

Gorgeous!!! I loved Sam's POV here, detailing his rift with Dean.

on 2009-10-07 09:05 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you! I'm glad that it worked for you :)

on 2009-10-07 09:39 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] inside-ring.livejournal.com
Aww. That's exactly what happened. We all know it.

on 2009-10-08 01:36 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Lol, of course it is ;)

on 2009-10-08 12:34 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] jjinmo-356.livejournal.com
this was just awesome, thank you, thank you, thank you would love to see more of you work.

on 2009-10-08 01:39 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you! I'm very glad you enjoyed it :)

on 2009-10-10 05:36 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] something-rare.livejournal.com
WOW, this is seriously one of the best fictions I have read recently! Very very well written!

I love ur LJ page, btw! Very beautiful.

on 2009-10-10 08:30 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you so much! I'm really glad that you thought so :D

Hee! Thanks, I kinda like it too *g*

on 2009-10-12 03:55 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] jackien1968.livejournal.com
This is beautiful.

Jackie

on 2009-10-13 02:36 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thank you so much!

on 2009-10-28 11:50 am (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] jespretender.livejournal.com
Lovely. Beautifully written, glad there's more to come!

on 2009-10-28 11:30 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
Thanks for reading and commenting!

on 2009-12-02 03:36 pm (UTC)
geckoholic: (SPN brothers impala)
Posted by [personal profile] geckoholic
Laaaaate comment, but:

There is a crack in the curtains that allows the pale yellow light from the parking lot to highlight the rumpled beds and the beat-up dresser next to the door. It bleaches all color from the room and for a moment Sam feels like he is caught in an old-fashioned photograph that has turned yellow with age.
Such a beautiful description, it really comes to live!

I love your way with words, a great read.

on 2009-12-02 10:09 pm (UTC)
Posted by [identity profile] pinkelephanti.livejournal.com
I love late comments!

Aww, I'm really glad you liked that bit :)
Thank you so much!

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